Dear friends,
Change is hard. If you are reading this, there is a good chance you are more committed to self-expansion and positive change than most. That said, if you have been working seriously at this for some time, the easy things have probably shown some good progress. It’s the hard ones that remain. Pursuing this thought, I have always pictured a very realistic scene.
You are leaving your home to go somewhere. You pass by a flower bed on your property and see a small weed. Bending over, you pull at it. But to your surprise that little weed seems to have a three-foot-long root! Ten minutes later your clothes are less clean, you have broken off the upper part of the weed down to a stub, you are a bit sweaty, and what’s left is smiling at you (laughing?). The easy things are… well… easy. What’s left may not be.
Too, there are times when I feel I have really been able to remove a quality in myself that has long plagued me. Only to find it is still there. It’s kind of like going up a mountain using a trail that circles the mountain over and over, but each time at a higher level.
To share a personal story: I used to be impatient at meetings. People (to my mind at least) would wander off topic and get caught debating tangential issues for extended periods of time. There are many variations on this theme, but I was happy about none of them. Unfortunately, I made little effort to at least hide my displeasure, to no one’s amusement.
So one day, before a meeting, I made sure to get a good half-hour meditation in before the meeting started. That accomplished, I walked in feeling great and totally ready to strut my newfound self-mastery. But I was told the meeting was delayed for a half hour. I thought, “No problem. I’ll just go to my desk and do a little more work.” Of course, when the meeting started the meditation was a distant memory, and I blew the meeting within ten minutes.
I went to my teacher and mentor and said, “This seems so unfair! I really wanted to get this right!” His reply was most interesting: “Sometimes when you are working at something Spirit makes it even harder. Then when you finally get it you really have it.” As Yogananda said, “One gets strong by wrestling with strong men, not babies."
So how do we do this, then? One of Yogananda's greatest disciples said her prayer was always, ”Change not one whit of my outer circumstances. Change only me.” It is very difficult, when a person or circumstance is challenging, not to wish it (or they) would be different. But the growth comes from looking inward, not outward. It may be true that the interaction or circumstance was 90% someone else’s fault, but the 10% that was your doing ought to get 100% of your attention.
Then that focus on oneself needs to be coupled with love. We are a work in progress. Expecting no areas to work on in oneself is actually a form of egotism. Of course we have stuff to work on! So let’s just get on with it with the same level of tenderness you would show a three-year-old or a puppy. Compared to the Perfection of Infinite Spirit that’s what we are. So what's the problem…? Love and steady application of will solves almost anything. Both are needed and both are definitely within our power. May Spirit shower down blessings of strength, love, and self-honesty to us all!
Blessings,
David G., manager
For the Gang at East West