Dear friends,
Wow. What a spate of not-the-best news these days. Ukraine? $6 gasoline? Soaring covid in Europe? Martians attack New York City? (O.K.—maybe I made that one up, but who knows…?) Time for a little levity. Here are some of my favorite cute stories from East West. A smile on the face is often a cure for what ails you…
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Customers often ask for our restroom key. I often like to reply, “Sure. It’s one of our most popular items!”
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We have an amazing 800 lb quartz crystal in the store. People are always stunned when looking at it, but at $250,000 it’s a bit pricey for most. I usually offer a 20% discount, which has not helped to date. I then point out it comes with a bumper sticker that says, “I saved $50,000 at East West Bookshop.” No luck still, but I’ll keep trying…
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I was talking with our crystal supplier who provides us with the stunning museum-quality crystals in our large blue case. We were looking at the crystals and I commented that I really liked one in particular and pointed at it. He said, “Shh! Don't say that. The one next to it gets jealous.” Amazing. So, I was sharing this story with a customer just a few days ago and I had just gotten to the “Shh” part when he interrupted and said, “Because the others will get jealous, right??” He then turned to the case and said, “You are all GORGEOUS!” Makes one wonder how much we don’t know about the world around us.
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One day, a woman came in with a large chocolate cake in a plastic box. It looked great. As she walked past me at the front desk, she asked, “Can I leave this up here while I shop?" My eyes got big and I said, “Oh YES! That would be GREAT!!” There was a moment of silence and she eyed me suspiciously until I broke into a huge grin. I said, “I promise I won’t eat much of it!” She laughed and did leave it, but I could see hesitation in her eyes. (It was all there when she got back—I promise!)
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We brought a gift item into the store recently. It’s a sign with a prayer on it that I think we can all relate to. But—as the best humor does—it spurred some deeper thoughts as well. “Lord, Keep your arm around my shoulders and your hand over my mouth. Amen.”
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There’s a fitness studio across from East West. Given recent conditions, the woman that runs it was recently doing her stretching classes outdoors on Castro Street. She shared a common and interesting occurrence with me: She said that at one point during the workout she says, “Now everyone turn and face East West.” For those who are new and perhaps not familiar with our store, they look quite puzzled for a moment. Imagine your instructor saying, “Now everyone...Turn left right."
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A charming story from some years ago: East West used to have a sing-a-long evening for customers for Christmas. One year the staffer leading the singing (who herself had a great voice) was on the guitar singing away when she heard someone in the group with a remarkable voice. She stopped after one carol was finished and said, “O.K., everybody. Listen to that lady over there and do your best to sing like she does!” Turned out “that lady over there” was Grammy Lifetime Achievement Award winner Joan Baez, who lives in the area and is still a frequent East West customer. You never know who’s going to stop in to pick up some great vibes!
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East West carries a cute little toy—a pendulum freely swinging over a circular pad. The pad is labeled at various points: “Yes”, “No”, “Maybe”, “Absolutely Not”, “For Sure!”, and “Try Again”. You flick the little ball hanging down and, because of an embedded magnet, the pendulum swings a modest number of times and then settles on an answer.
People come in and play with it and I often see people flicking away. I usually go up to the person using it and say, “Just for you to know: If you make a major life decision based on this, East West is not responsible!” This usually gets a good laugh, but every once in a great while someone looks at me somewhat seriously as if to say, “O.K.—good to know!” One time I was walking past and a young woman was using it. She asked aloud but under her breath, “Should I get married?” I thought, “Oh my goodness!”
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A husband and wife came into the store. They stopped near the front desk and I heard her tell him, “I’ll just be ten minutes.” It is rare for someone to come into East West and be ten minutes! I went over to him and said in a stage whisper, “You might want to go to the movies!” She was not ten minutes. :-)
Blessings,
David G., Manager
for the Gang at East West