Dear friends,
We all know (or at least most of you reading this!) what good behavior looks like. Be kind, be non-judgmental, be supportive, smile, listen attentively, etc. The difficulty is that sometimes we wind up engaging in behaviors other than these. Ever noticed that?
We all want to be better and we strive to move in the right direction. At the same time, though, forcing outward behavior without inner realization has its own drawbacks.
We are who we are. We strive to be better, but affirmation can only take us so far. There is a fine line between discipline and repression. We strive to be someone else, someone better, which is of course entirely appropriate. But we need to be sure not to create an alternate pretend persona and thus lose touch with our own inner feelings and sensibilities. If we do, we then help that alternate persona find Spirit. We need to find the Spirit within ourselves as who we really are, not for the almost-perfect-stranger we have mentally created!
I feel that part of this is due to a lack of self-acceptance. We tend to see the world the way we want it to be and not the way it is. That includes our own flaws and foibles. Have you ever noticed how easy it is to see everyone else’s flaws? Why is it so hard to see ourselves clearly? The ostrich, hiding his head in the sand when danger approaches, is actually not all that inspiring. “Oh no! Here comes a flaw of mine!” (hides)
Self-acceptance is the first step. When you were in fourth grade and made a mistake on your math test I am hoping you did not feel humiliated. Did you hide the error from the teacher? What is gained by that? How does that help us learn? We ought to be grateful when we see a flaw or error, because it is only by seeing it that we can learn to accept it and work to become better.
It is our great desire to be better than we are that has us mentally pretend we already are. Self-acceptance is the cure. We all have flaws, but we are all children of the Infinite Spirit. We are simply here in fourth grade trying to learn from the life we find ourselves enmeshed in. May we be open and grateful for every misstep, as that is where the learning is and what will eventually set us free.
Blessings,
David G., manager
for the Gang at East West