Dear friends,
It is a lovely and uplifted soul that automatically wants to help when witnessing someone in pain or distress. The heart goes out to those suffering, and wants to ease their discomfort.
But the question is actually more subtle than that, though the initial impulse is laudable and appropriate. I would like to share a story that brought this lesson home to me.
When I was a boy I lived in a nice suburban home. We had a built-in swimming pool in the backyard and I would spend hours in it, as little boys do.
One day I saw a large bug floating in the water. He did not look the least bit happy about his plight, but he also looked menacing (in body, that is — it was hard for me to determine his facial expression). I thus very carefully scooped water up with both hands and with him in the middle, and tossed him onto the sidewalk at the edge of the pool.
He looked a touch stunned, but the moment he recovered he headed right back for the pool and plopped in! The nerve! After all the time and effort I spent rescuing him.
After reflecting on it in later years the story had quite an impact on me. Are we helping because it is what is called for? Or perhaps we are helping because we’d feel bad if we didn’t? Or we cannot stand to see suffering? Or it makes us feel noble? Or…
If, for example, you see a chick struggling to get out of its shell, why not help just a little? In fact, as any breeder will tell you, that is exactly the wrong thing to do for multiple reasons.
The question is and always must be: What does Spirit want to have happen here? Sometimes people learn what is needed through their unpleasant experiences. Removing them, in that case, is not a service.
I have always felt that rules of thumb are not really the way to navigate through life. Constantly asking for guidance and remaining open to more than we currently know makes us ever more likely to do what is best in even the most complex situations. The very practice of pausing and mentally asking, in itself has great benefits. Not the least of which is developing the humility to accept that our first impulse is not always right, whether it be offering aid or anything else. And open heart and mind has many benefits beyond the scope of this brief post.
May we desire to help others when possible, but may we always be open to allowing Spirit’s plan to unfold as intended.
Blessings,
David G., manager
For the Gang at East West